FaceBook Post Oct 7th 2017

I Remember this night 5 years so clearly. LAST game LAST walk across the field to Kenny chesneys boys of fall. (which Ky played at Trev's funeral ) for what for would be the LAST TIME HIS GUYS WOULD BE TOGETHER. I think every players heart was moved when Pete laid TREVS #26 jersey that his teammates signed on top of his still chest. The last night of football there was not a dry eye. The day Trev was found dead our home was FILLED with so many tears. Even Trev's bedroom filled with his friends reminiscing. Some with beers that they felt were maybe a comfort. A tower of cans on his desk, stories told, memories shared. Tears of love. Looking at this picture knowing the closeness these two shared the bond even from hundreds of miles away from each other Every time I see this Or think of it I cried before. Now The lump in my throat makes me breathless the tears that fall with the pit in my stomach deep. Sitting here in your room the house empty, pain is all so very real. close the windows and scream into your pillow With the vision of me shaking your lifeless body with all the strength I have SCREAMING WAKE UP......PLEEEEASE!!!!! ITS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS WAY.......HARD TO CATCH A BREATH I SCREAM ANYTHING THAT FILLS MY HEAD, MY HEART, MY LIFE. I HATE THIS PART OF ME, MY LIFE , MY EXISTENCE. I HATE THAT IYOUR BROTHER DOESNT HAVE HIS OTHER HALF, THAT YOUR DAD IS MISSING SUCH A HUGE CHUNK OF HIS BEING AND THAT I AM LEFT WITHOUT YOU!

(EVEN FOR ALL REASONS NOT SO RIGHT, IT IS SO FITTING THAT THIS COMES THE DAY AFTER YOUR BEST FRIENDS BIRTHDAY)